Practice Makes Perfect

For Christmas my parents gave me a Beginners' Knitting Kit.  All I need to learn how to knit in one convenient package!  I have been looking through all the materials and the book, but it seems I am supposed to supply not only the yarn but the patience to learn this new skill as well.  Maybe it's just because I was a little distracted when I tried to teach myself yesterday, but I decided that I'm going to see if some of my friends here might be willing to help me get started with the basics.  Many times in my life this is how I get started on different things.  I have an idea about something I want to try, figure out the basics of how to try it, but then decide it might be better to seek the knowledge of someone who actually knows what they are doing.  My mom has always said I'm a mimic.  She could apparently tell who I hung out with on the monkey bars on any given day based on my speech patterns (or attitude choices) when I was home later that day.  My goal is to balance a life of authentic experiences of my own while not reinventing the wheel every time a new opportunity presents itself.  Through watching my friends and family, watching fun movies, reading inspiring text, and learning from my past experiences - both negative and positive - I am starting to believe that I have a good idea of where to go, what to do, and how to behave in the next few chapters, or maybe just sentences, in my life.

A little insight to my basic principles of how I try to live my life: do unto others what I would want done to me; take time to look around and appreciate and internalize the beauty surrounding me regardless of my actual physical surroundings; give love freely; find deep, actual gratitude for the small things that bring much joy into our lives; do what I can, where I am, with what I have.  I mention this because I have to remind myself of these things on a daily basis.  Today I was walking in the outdoor art gallery in Port Angeles and was so immersed in the stealthy art pieces in the tree branches that I almost missed a simple, but comforting, piece under my feet.  A small stone with waves on it fortunately caught my eye and I was indeed reminded to take the time to look around.

I have a few days left of winter break, and as refreshing and rejuvenating this time has been I feel like I am ready to be back to work.  The four months that I have been living and working in Port Angeles and surrounding areas has only made it even more clear to me that I deeply desire to be working with students, especially those who may not have all the support or resources or love that they should from their home lives. In addition to working with the students I have very much enjoyed working on projects that benefit members of the community that I am living in, as well as working and playing in natural areas of this beautiful part of the Earth.  Feeling the dirt between my fingers and taking deep, exhilarating, exciting and relaxing breaths of fresh, salty air makes me remember why I take those seemingly small and insignificant measures to reduce my impact on Earth's natural resources and ecosystems.

That being said, there are so many times when I have very little or no patience with myself for not getting things "right" in regards to my work or personal life.  SO many times I think about a better way to explain something to one of my students or a better response to the various people I interact with or what I wish I might have done in the past so that maybe, maybe, I could be living an "adult" life right now complete with higher rent, a possible car payment, enough money that I could actually buy those super cute heels, and the time and resources to actually start traveling.  Then I realize that none of those would be a given if I my job and life were different right now.  And I also realize that I do frequently look to the teachers around me for ideas about how to explain words or concepts to the students, and that this in turn helps me prepare for the next time a student asks me for help on something that I have not explained before.  Mimicking at its finest?

I know I'll continue to work on living out my ideals I wrote above.  As long as I have an idea about how I want to live my life I feel like I at least have a somewhat cleared path to meander along.  And when I take the time to look up and notice the beauty around me I might be pleasantly surprised by sights like this view that I saw on ly walk in the art today:

When I looked closely and intently, I could see the snow capped mountains of Vancouver Island.  As for the knitting, when I told one friend about the "learning to knit" kit I was given he replied "Oh, so everyone will be getting scarves for Christmas next year?"  I looked at him with a smile and replied "No way!  Hats, sweaters, shawls, mittens!  I'm gonna practice and practice and practice and get good at this new hobby!"  Hopefully I'll be lucky and have some guidance from some friends so I actually can practice to make perfect (gifts).

Happy New Year!  May 2011 find you happy, healthy and peaceful!
 

What A Long, Strange Trip It's Been

For the past few years the Winter Solstice has felt more like the beginning of a new year to me then January 1st on the calendar year.  Here are some of my favorite memories from this year with some visual aides to help illustrate these memories.  Cheers to this next year and all it may bring!

Really don't think I had ever laughed so hard (or ever eaten Chinese food!) on Christmas before!  Celebrated the fact we learned we were going to be Aunties and Uncles!  Congrats to Paul and Erin!

A few days later Kath and I were off to NYC!  Subway rides, art exhibits, New Year's Eve in Time's Square, making friends from all over the place, seeing family, SISTER TIME, snow fall.  It was a successful trip in every meaning of the word.

Surprise visit from a fantastic friend.  The talks in that short weekend helped me refocus some of my energy to where I really wanted it to be.

Began my last semester of undergraduate school.  Thought I knew right where I'd be when I was done with the semester; funny how much changes in a mere 16 weeks.

Friend-en-tine, rather than Valentine.  Worked perfectly for me and the place my head was this February 14th.  So much coffee and learning chess.  Those Friday mornings were the highlights of my spring.  It was a time of growth, of myself, of friendship, and of some serious chess skills!  :)

Decided I would NOT start a teaching credential program after graduation.  Well, NOW WHAT?  ...but I couldn't have made that decision without some serious parental love and support.

Graduation!  Moved that tassel (that was worth the hassle) to the left side of the cap; celebrated with family and friends on one of the first sunny, warm days of summertime.  Almost time to start a new life even though I still didn't know what that was going to be.

Yuba time!  Going to the sunny river, becoming pink mermaids, meeting Byaobob, reading Chic Lit and fashion magazines.  Perfect days.  

Went to my first Pride Parade and saw all the beautiful people.  Gorgeous, sunny day in the city filled with love. <3

Got to share "my" Big Basin Redwoods and favorite Santa Cruz beach, along with Marianne's.  Throw in some amber beer from the mountain brewery and so much laughter in the sand and surf.  What a fantastic way to start my summer.

Birthday in Vancouver.  Hanging out with my ladies!  Fitting the luggage in the trunk was an unexpected jigsaw puzzle to complete.  Giggles, giggles, giggles.  Drinks with some friends from another lifetime.  Learning what living a "koutenay" life means.  Somehow made it onto the ship with 10 minutes to spare!  

Alaska with the family.  Dancing the night away with almost all 17 of us on the dance floor!  Fancy dinners, marine life, sea kayaking, trying escargot with with the cuzzos, first interview, surely some shenanigans thrown in somewhere!  Lucky I have such a great family!

Time to start packing!  Trying to spend time with friends before I move to...somewhere!  Burritos, late nights, boxes, State Fair, dress fittings and dress fittings and dress fittings.  July flew by!

Two days before I moved I got the call!  Port Angeles, here I come!  Got my stuff out of the old house, one last sunburned day at the Yuba.  Bubbles and naps and swirling waters.  Dinner at the worm farm.  Got down to the South Bay just in time...chill time at the house with Argos. 

And then, Lani and Aaron's wedding!  Calmest bride EVER. Fun girly time at the salon.  Best ceremony ever.  Beauty.  Then, dancing dancing dancing!!!  ...and Andre Andre Andre!  Fun times.

Off to the East Coast!  Family time with the "East Coasters."  First drive through Pennsylvania, Ohio and Michigan. Don't you dare add any salt to ANYTHING! Life is salty enough, after all!  More kayaking, more swimming.  Delicious, really delicious, food too!

Back home with just enough time to end summer with DMB, and then it was time to exit California.  Road trip of sorts with Mom and Dad.  Revisiting memories of previous trips up I-5. Welcome to Port Angeles!  

Meeting the my new housemates was like coming back to a home I didn't know existed.  Our yellow kitchen, idea wall on the fridge, the pear tree, music floating through the house, cooking experiments; love it.

Sharing "inappropriate cheers" and having those giggle fits make life easier when otherwise it would be really difficult.  New friends becoming a family.  

Watching my little sister graduate made me so proud!  She's amazing and super smart and makes the world a better place.  The resulting celebration brought out sides of my family I didn't know were there.  Ha!  Thanks for giving us a reason, Kath!

To end the year, Apollo ate Sirius.  Laying in the driveway of the house that I grew up in while the Earth's shadow covered the moon.  As I looked at the sky I was thinking about the various skies I've looked at this year, the different stages of the moon I've seen while looking up from different patches of Earth, where I've seen the Milky Way and the awe that always ensues.  Happy Solstice to you!  May the new year and returning sun bring you light and love and happiness!

Come On, Take My Hand

The Yuba, the river I love

This summer I was at my favorite "beach" spot at my favorite river with one of my favorite people.  We were lucky that day; the sun was shining, the water was clear and abundant, and the fish were our only competition for swimming space. He and I were discussing life and our frustrations at not being able to do more to help...just in the vaguest, most general sense of the word.  We asked ourselves what could we do to make our world, wherever we are at the moment, a better place?  Our solution: act like a five year old.  My thinking behind this during that discussion was that kids, up to a certain age, generally don't discriminate against one another based on one another's background or personal beliefs or if they do or don't have money.  Sure, kids get upset about someone not sharing a favorite toy or someone cutting them in line or using the eraser they wanted to use "because that color of eraser works the best."  Usually, though, after a few minutes of sulking they are ready to be friends with the offender.  We wondered that day, "What if we all treated each other with the kind of unconditional love and admiration we so often see children exhibit to other children?"

My belief that acting like five year olds would make the world a happier and overall better place has been strengthened in my time thus far while working nine hours a day with elementary age students.  The best times are when they think no adults are watching.  This past week I heard many of the third grade students talking about their classmate who fell and knocked out some of his teeth.  They were worried that he was still in pain late into the afternoon because "hitting your mouth on metal hurts a lot."  Another time I saw two boys who are in the same grade walking down the hall.  One boy was much taller than the other one, but the shorter boy was the one helping the other one down the hall.  The tall boy had a wad of paper towels pressed against his face and the shorter boy had one arm around his classmate helping to steer him in the right direction all the while with the sweetest, and most genuine, look of concern on his face.  Then there was the time in the afterschool program I work in where one child was throwing a temper tantrum about the color of folder he was given.  One of the sweetest girls in the program saw what was going on, came up to him and said "It's ok, you can have my blue folder, and I'll take your orange one."  The fact that she saw the opportunity to make someone's life better by doing a simple, heartfelt action left me with a swell of hope.  One more example: a couple of students I work with daily on math had just received their math test scores.  Both of the students had similar scores, but one did score a little higher than the other one.  Both of the students though congratulated the other one on a job well done and made some comments about how hard they knew they had each worked and that they could always try harder on the next test.  My heart just about burst.

I remind my students of lessons they have learned on a daily basis.  The silent "e" on the end of a word makes the vowel in the word make the long vowel sound.  Borrowing from the tens place requires you to essentially take away one number from the tens place to make it so you actually can subtract eight from three.  But really, my students are the ones who remind me of how to live out a good and happy life - act like a five year old.

A Circle's Round...

It's that time of year when I reflect more than usual about the bounty of things I am thankful for.  It makes sense, it being Thanksgiving tomorrow...in the United States at least.  I have a personal practice of remembering to be thankful for various happenings throughout my days.  One day it will be a  surprise text from a friend I haven't heard from in a while, or maybe being able to see the moon hanging over the harbor, or something as simple as walking down the street and having a stranger smile and say "Hello!" to me.  But right now, on this Thanksgiving Eve, I am thinking about the "Big Thankfuls" I have going on in my life right now.

My dad re-tying my mattress on the van
in Medford, OR; Day 2 of moving me up to PA

In my room I have pictures of my family all over every surface.  There is a picture of my mom and dad on their wedding day; pictures of me and Kath in Seattle and New York City in their respective city frames; a whole family picture from the Alaskan cruise 17 of us went on in July; one of my grandma, Kath and me from about 10 years ago; and my favorite, which sits right next to my bed, a photo booth set Kath and I took at the State Fair this past summer.  I'm guessing you can tell what I am thankful for the most this year.  My family is amazing.  I am thankful that they claim me as one of their clan.  I have been all over the place this year in trying to decide what to do after graduating, and they patiently listened to my pipe dreams of finding the perfect farming apprenticeship where I could have learned to grow my own food and how the earth works and sustains my brothers and sisters.  They listened as I contemplated applying to teach English overseas.  They wished me luck as I had my first AmeriCorps interview from the cruise ship in Skagway, AK.  And then they held my hand and wiped my tears and hugged me hard as they helped me say good-bye to Sacramento and hello to the Pacific Northwest.  My mom and dad graciously moved me up and helped me cross the bridge of living in a different place for the very first time.  My sister has carved out time to talk at least weekly, if not more, and we can stay caught up on each other's triumphs, challenges, and "Aydos!"

The North Olympic AmeriCorps Team at the end of training

I am thankful for my AmeriCorps teammates who have made me feel accepted, especially my housemates, Marie and Megan.  I have a safe place where I can talk to someone if I need to or can go hole up in my room and know that regardless of which I do I still feel welcomed and wanted.  I am thankful for my kitchen table, where there have been heart-to-hearts, girl talks, laughing fits and life talks.  I am thankful I am surrounded by people who, from the start, have wanted to make this more than a job and more than co-workers and create a community.  I'm still getting to know people and deepen my friendships with others, but I already know that I will be friends with some of these guys and gals for years and years to come.

A place I was thankful to be at...

Lastly, for tonight, I am thankful for this Earth.  She is kind and gracious and especially gorgeous in my neck of the woods.  So many days I think to myself or marvel aloud as to how fortunate I feel to be in this place that is pure beauty.  The mountains peeping up in my backyard.  The water of the Strait of Juan de Fuca shining blue and glassy.  The green green green trees that provide oxygen for my lungs to digest.  The waves that crash, and the purple and green and blue clouds, and the deer running through yards, and the seagulls that call, and the bright moons, and the golden sun rays.  This is a place to be thankful for.  Any place is a place to be thankful for.  We must remember to open our eyes and see the good that is in front of us and be thankful for being able to see that beauty.  Be thankful for the time we have spent wherever we have been.  When I was in fourth grade one of the fourth grade teachers encouraged us to say "Thank you" to a fish we were going to dissect.  At the time I didn't think much of it, but the idea stuck with me.  I am thankful for being able to dip my finger tips in the water lapping the lake shores and crashing onto the beaches.  I am thankful for the salty kisses of the mist from waves.  I am thankful for fresh, white snow powder to fall in and make a snow angel.  I am thankful.

Happy Thanksgiving!  May all of you have love and happiness and thankfulness in your heart today and always.  I am thankful for you.

Down the Rabbit Hole

When I was offered the AmeriCorps position I'm now in I knew I would have a multitude of adventures and make new friends and basically have an all-around, brand new type of life experiences.  I had no idea, however, that I would be having the time of my life while simultaneously learning so much about myself.

November was already set up to be an odd month work-wise.  For three weeks in a row we have not had a full work week.  First, there was Veteran's Day and a conference day.  Last Monday brought another conference day, and so only four days of school.  Friday morning the kids were all abuzz with anticipation of an impending snow storm that was scheduled to come in that night.  I had to leave school early to attend an AmeriCorps meeting with my local, Port Angeles, team.  There I got to share the news that one of my students, who had previously done everything in her power to show her disdain for me, had actually asked me for help in class the day before!  This was probably my biggest success thus far.  I literally wanted to skip down the rows of desks because I was so excited about this one encounter.  Before the meeting I went to lunch with Paige, and had such a delightful time talking with her and learning more about her and her life.  She and I traded stories that have more depth than a 10 minute break at school will allow.  She and I both commented on how having a built in community with our AmeriCorps team members made being here fairly easy, and way easier than I had anticipated.  I recently realized that I am much more independent and self-sufficient than I had previously thought.  This is a huge step for me personally because I had been very used to  sort of having my hand held through things.  That being said, I'd be lost without the unique and balanced group of my AmeriCorps teammates.  

Ferry ride back to Anacortes

Fisherman's Bay on Lopez at sunset

On Friday I drove over to Port Townsend to catch the ferry to Whidbey Island so I could meet up with Riley.  Michelle was nice enough to babysit my car, and drop me off and pick me up at the ferry terminal.  I didn't have to worry about if my car was safe, and I didn't have to walk in the freezing rain that was falling Friday as I left.  Just another testament to the kind of people I am fortunate enough to be working with.  After Riley picked me up we made a little stop in Anacortes, loaded up his truck and hopped on another ferry to Lopez Island.  Just as we were boarding the ferry it started to snow!  We jetted out of the car, pulled on our hoods and ventured up to the decks of the ferry.  The snow swirled around us and made a kind of tunnel over one of the sides on the deck.  Some other passengers decided to have a snowball fight with the snow that was accumulating on various parts of accessible windows.  I was a little hesitant to walk out because I could see that ice-cold water below and snow whirling above, but I'm glad Riley convinced me to walk out with him.  It truly was a magical experience.  I got to see a lot of cool spots on Lopez Island and had a great, relaxing and thought-provoking weekend.  The snow stuck the whole time, and it just added to the already beautiful scenery.  After narrowly making the ferry off Lopez Island, I had some coffee with Riley and his mom at her house.  The sun was streaming in the living room window as well as reflecting off the water of Burrows Bay.  His mom asked me if I was ready to "go back to reality," meaning Port Angeles and work.

My mailbox this morning; apparently
Mother Earth thought it needed some
more decoration! 

I thought about it for a second, but I already knew the answer.  Of course I was ready!  The students I work with have become the reason I am here.  As great as it is to be able to saunter over to a San Juan Island for the weekend, that's just a side benefit of getting to work with the students I do.  I wonder about what they're doing over the weekend, and what stories and adventures some of them might share with me.  With others I wonder if they have enough food to eat or are safe over the weekend.  Today brought a snow day, and anywhere between eight inches and two feet of snow.  We already got the call that we won't have school tomorrow, either.  Even though I had a fun time romping around in the powder and sledding down hills with Megan, I will be happy to see "my kids" on Wednesday and be able to check in with them, even just for a day before Thanksgiving break.  They'll be hyped up, I'm sure, and probably a lot restless, having only to go to school for one day this week.  Selfishly, I will be happy to see them so I can try and find a way to tell them that they are what I am most thankful for this year.

Something Old, Something New

This past weekend one of my very best friends, Lani, and her husband, Aaron, came to visit me!  It took me almost the whole first day they were here to realize part of my California world was in my Washington world.  I was so happy to see them, and have an "excuse" to go exploring!

Shining sun & a yummy breakfast!

On Friday Lani, Aaron, Megan and I headed out to the west end of the peninsula.  I had seen signs a few weeks ago for Cape Flattery, the "most Northwestern point of the continental United States."  I'd also heard some great things about that area.  After making a delicious and filling breakfast of Chocolate Chip Pancakes we packed a picnic basket of snacks and piled into my car.

Surfer Beach, Beach Babes

We decided that on the way to Cape Flattery we would stop wherever looked interesting.  The first place we stopped at was an unmarked beach that had some amazing views and seemed to be a popular surf spot.  There were about 10 surfers in the short waves; usually I am envious of surfers being out on the water, but not that day!  The water seemed too cold, and some surfers even had wet suit head coverings!  Brrrrrrr!  After collecting some driftwood, rocks, shells, and pictures we climbed back into the car and continued west.

The Ascent

As we drove along Highway 112 we kept seeing places where one or two cars could fit, parked just off the side of the road.  I announced to the car that the next one we came to I was going to pull over so we could check out more of the coast line.  I couldn't have made this announcement at a better time because the next pull-out was an amazing little spot!  There were tide pools where we spotted some hermit crabs and there were also two sets of large rocks that were calling our names to go climb them.  Megan made it up first and coached me up behind her.  From the top of the rocks we had an uninterrupted view of the floating objects we pretended were otters, the strait across to Vancouver Island, and two container ships cruising by. After Megan was done pretending she was Ariel singing "Part of Your World" (the waves crashing on the rocks beckoned the song, really...) we climbed down, avoided the incoming tide that was surrounding the rocks we had used to climb up, and headed over the to "cave" Lani had found.  After a little bit more water-evading we were surrounded by boulders, but could see through some small openings to the waves.  Magical.

After a few hours of driving, laughing, chatting, and snacking we made it to Cape Flattery.  When we got to the parking lot for the trail we looked around for some clue as to how long the hike down and back was going to be.  None of the signs said anything.  Ever fearless and friendly Lani asked a guy in the parking lot who told us it was 3/4 of a mile down there, parts of the trail were really muddy, and it was a steep climb coming back up.  Well, we were already there, so why not make the last bit of the trek?  I am so glad we did!  First of all, the trail was a little bit muddy, but not the kind that tries to suck off your shoes or anything.  Second of all, at least half of the trail was boardwalk or had wooden stepping stones.  There were lookout points along the way that provided some amazing views.  The vegetation reminded me of a mix between the coastline in California near Monterey and the parts of Alaska that I saw.  There were caves the water crashed into.  I wondered what those caves will look like, or how big they'll be, in 100 or 1000 years from now.  The sun was already starting to set and if the clouds had parted a little more it would have created quite the show.  Aaron was nice enough to drive home.  After a taco and cake dinner we all hit the hay pretty early to get ready for another day of exploration.

Saturday Lani, Aaron, and I left in the opposite direction on the peninsula out to Port Townsend.  That day we just relaxed, ate a delicious lunch, window shopped, and had coffee at a cozy place that serves fair trade coffee and offers raw milk for their drinks.  After walking around a little bit more we went home and Lani and I got ready to go out and dance to Deadwood Revival, the bluegrass band I saw on Halloween.  Lani, Megan, some more AmeriCorps girls, and I danced and had a great time.  Sunday morning brought the departure of Lani and Aaron.  I so enjoyed their visit and getting to spend some time with these long time friends.


Today there was no school so I got to sleep in and relax a bit.  I went to the Tribal Center with Megan to sort out some of the materials we have and to try and figure out how to best utilize our time and tangible resources so the kids get the most out of both.  Tomorrow brings a time to test out our talk.  The wind and rain are blowing hard outside tonight, but I am cozy inside listening to the soundtrack of my house (Alexi Murdoch from the "Away We Go" soundtrack) and Megan's infectious laughter.  Yep, life is still really, really great.